USUK and Me
by Eric-I-Love-USUK-Johnson
Summary: This is the tale of me and my meeting with America and England. (Rated M for language and hints towards smut)


_**So this is what I think would happen if I met England and America...with my real life incorporated into it. Don't like; don't read. Rated M for language and hints of smut.**_

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"Gah! I hate math!" my foster brother Al cried as he slammed his pencil down. I let out a soft chuckle and looked at his homework; ignoring the fact that he was really a she and I had an impressive sight of his chest. "Okay; look. If you're gonna help me work; stop looking at my chest." he snapped; shoving me.

You see; Al is a transgender bi-sexual at 19. He is F2M (female to male) and has been saving up for his surgery. Me and my half brother, Cornelius Niles (yes yes; laugh away; we're used to it :| I call him Core but he prefers Corey) have been supporting him since he came out to us. Core is a gay man at the age of 24 and I'm a bi-sexual male at the tender age of 19. I was adopted into Al's family and I found out that he and I shared a birthday (how fucking cool is that!) so we call each other twins. He and I look sort of alike; we can easily pass off as one another if dressed properly. We both have dark hair and eyes (even though mine are hazel and his are really dark brown); with a darker skin tone due to us being Metis (don't know what Metis is? Look up Canadian history: Louis Riel) and Core has blondish/reddish hair (he's British with Canadian roots) with greenish-blue eyes. He wears glasses most of the time and is childish at the best of times. (But anyway; back to my story)

I fell into the wastebasket in Al's room and he snickered. As soon as he turned back to work on his 'impossible' mathwork; I threw a ball of paper at him.

It went down his shirt and he stood up; pissed off.

"Uh...uh; _shiiiiiiit..._A-Al...I'm sorry...!" I cried as he walked towards me. I quickly scrambled to my feet as Core opened the door; staring at us. Al reached down his shirt and pulled out the ball of paper before throwing it away and grabbing me.

"You little fucking scumbag, Eric...I should teach you a fucking lesson!" he growled coldly; glaring into my eyes. Core immediately pulled Al off of me and held him back; allowing me to choke and get air back in my lungs. Al tried to throw Core off him and I took the chance to bolt out the door.

"IF YOU SHOW YOUR FACE TO ME AGAIN I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!" Al's voice resonated along the walls of our house.

I slowly walked outside; legs severely cramping. _Shit...I shouldn't have ran out of the house like that...fuck fuck fuck my legs are going to-_ Before I got a chance to finish my thoughts; I collapsed on the sidewalk in pain. People were rushing to my side and I felt a pair of strong arms lift me up.

"Dude; you alright?" came the voice behind the arms. I glanced back at the man who helped me; his blue eyes staring in mine. "Ye-yeah..." I breathed. "What happened? Ya drunk or something?" Immediately I felt ashamed. "N-no...my...legs are strong anymore...in fact; up until a month ago I've been in a wheelchair..." I admitted; a light blush crossing my cheeks. "Oh...well anyway; the name of your hero is-" "Alfred Jones." I finished for him with a grin; amazement in his eyes. "How'd yo-" "I'm...I'm kind of psychic."

He helped me walk to a restaurant; the both of discussing our boyfriends. When I told him about my boyfriend, he made us stop. "Wait. Waitwaitwait a minute here, dude. You're telling me that you, a nineteen year old boy...is engaged to be married AND dating a man that's 5 years older than you?" Alfred asked. "No; I said that my fiancé is five years older than me and we still act like we're dating. Dude; I'm not dating someone behind my man's back!" I laughed. "But you're a kid!" he cried. "You look like one yourself. You look good for your age." I commented with a smile. He grinned. "You have no idea..."

"ALFRED. F JONES; WHERE THE BLOODY 'ELL HAVE YOU BEEN! AND WHO'S THIS ON YOUR ARM!? ARE YOU REALLY CHEATING ON ME, YOU BLOODY WANKER!?" came a loud and obviously angry voice from the cafe across the street. "Oh great...Arthur thinks we're dating..." Alfred groaned.

The angry Brit stormed right up to us and I held my hands up. "Mr. Arthur, sir...I never meant for this to happen. Y'see; I've got bad legs and he was helping me walk." Arthur stopped before me and looked me up and down. "Show me." "Er-what?" "Your legs; show me."

So I sat on the ground (okay; fell) and rolled up my pant-legs. I showed him the scars on my legs and looked up at him. "I was in a car accident back in February. I suffered the worst of it because I saved my half brother and foster brother from it." I looked at Alfred; who seemed stunned. "I shoved them out of the way and used my own body to shield them. And I nearly lost my legs from it."

Arthur looked shocked. Alfred knelt down to me and looked at Arthur. "Whattya know...not all human's are selfish pricks..." Arthur muttered with a chuckle. "Heh; the embodiment of England gave me a compliment." I laughed. They both froze; staring at me.

"How'd you know that!" Arthur snapped. Alfred looked hurt. "He's a psychic; he can read our thoughts and shit..." "Not quite in that context, America. Yes, I am a psychic but my powers are more on the intellectual level. Thoughts can be detected on a basic level but i have a higher level; I can sense thoughts, feelings, emotions, lies and the truth." I confessed.

"You'd be a great ally for the Allies. Would you like to meet the rest of the countries, old chap?" Arthur asked; extending a hand down to me. I accepted it and stood slowly; grinning. "I would love to! May I bring my love with me?" "Your...love?" Arthur repeated blankly. "Yes. He's the best thing in my life...may I please bring him? I can take you to him so you can meet him!" I cried; getting excited. "Sure thing, dude! Let's meet him!"

So we got into Alfred's car (which was at the end of the block; he was trying to get me there in the first place) and he started the engine. "Where to?" he asked; looking at me, who had the entire back to myself. "Los Angeles." I said with a smirk. "WOO! WE'RE GOIN' TO LA!" Alfred cried; pulling out of his parking spot before Arthur could get his seatbelt on.

"YOU BLOODY GIT; SLOW THE 'ELL DOWN!" Arthur screamed. I laughed. _Last time someone drove this recklessly I was in the car with him. Heh; I can't wait to see him..._ I thought; a blush crossing my cheeks and a smile on my lips. "What's his name?" Arthur asked; glancing at me. "His name is Randal but he prefers to be called Randy. We've been together five years and engaged almost a year." I blushed more. Arthur smiled softly. "I wish you both the best of luck."

When we finally made Alfred stop; I directed him to my fiance's house. He pulled up in the driveway and I spotted him in the garage working on his car. Before the countries could stop me; I got out of the car and yelled "RANDY!" loudly. He turned quickly and grinned; throwing his arms around me. "Baby; I missed you so much...are you alright?" he asked softly; brushing the hair out of my eyes. "Yes, baby; I'm fine." I replied. I gave him a kiss as Alfred and Arthur joined us.

"Uh; baby...who're they?" Randy asked; eyeing them as they approached me. "Oh; they're my friends. Alfred Jones and Arthur Kirkland; I'd love you to meet my fiance; Randy Johnson." I said; gesturing to them as I introduced them. Alfred eagerly shook his hand and Arthur shook it politely. "Hello Randy; it's nice to meet you." "Dude; it's another Brit! He sounds as sexy as your half brother-" Randy started before I punched him. "Shut up...Core has enough to deal with from your brother!" I hissed.

"Uh; excuse me?" Alfred growled; standing before Arthur, who tried to calm him down. "Did you call my Arthur sexy?" "No dude; I called that accent of his sexy. Chill out, man." Randy sighed; pulling out a joint and lighting up. He took a hit and offered it to me. I turned it down and he shrugged.

"Geez...he smokes weed?" said the countries; disgusted. "It's a relaxant. It helps him deal with his anger. It helps me and my half brother as well. It's better than him being trigger-happy." I said with a chuckle. Alfred and Arthur gave each other a look. "He's not going to hurt you; not with me around." I laughed. Randy nodded as his high hit; a grin on his face.

"Well...as much as we'd love to...'stick around'; I'm afraid Alfred and I must get going. It was nice meeting you, Eric. When shall we pick you up for the meeting tomorrow?" Arthur asked. "Uhh...where's it being held?" "Here in California, dude!" Alfred cried. "Then you can pick me up here an hour before it starts. Nice meeting you...England and America." I shook their hands before they left then called out "Don't invade his vital regions until you're at home!" I laughed.

"Dude; the fuck was that about?" Randy asked as we walked inside. "Oh; Alfred helped me after my legs gave out." "What! Are you alright?" he said; hand on my face and staring in my eyes. I smiled and replied "Randy; I'm tougher than I look. Of course I'm fine. Baby; I got you." I said cutely; looking as innocent as possible. He laughed and we sat on the couch. "Now tell me everything!" Randy demanded. So I told him how my day was and we had an amazing dinner (with a...hot dessert afterwards, if you know what I mean). We went to the meeting and had a dinner with Alfred and Arthur.

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_The end! Hope you liked it! :D_


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